One of life's main lessons is that we are all bound to fail at times, no matter how hard we work or how much we resist it. The good news is we have the ability to turn failures into successes, weaknesses into strengths, by accepting the setback and retrying. Otherwise the pressure of a failure or unmet goal hampers our wellbeing. Many of us believe life is a competition, and success is essential for happiness. These misconceptions make us fear failures in life. We treat failures as enemies, rather than as teachers to learn lessons from. But it is said that when we fail, experience and learning are our rewards.
1. Don't create guilt over mistakes or failures. Guilt leads to a feeling of I am not good enough. When you understand that you have just done wrong, you will be able to correct it or do it right the next time. But if you believe that failure means you are not good enough, it lowers your self-esteem.
2. Talk to yourself everyday to take responsibility of your thoughts and feelings. It helps you realize that your self-worth is independent of your success. You will also realize that your peace and happiness are states of being, created while working towards the goal, not a feeling to be experienced after achieving the goal.
3. Failure is unavoidable at times. Check that you had done your best. If so, accept yourself completely. Take the experience, the lessons and promise yourself to not repeat the mistake. Conserve energy by not weakening, blaming, questioning or going into guilt. Use that energy to strengthen yourself and move forward.
4. Understand that situations and people are not in your control. How you respond to them is in your control. True failure happens only if you give up, not if you are ready to re-try.
5. Set goals, plan, execute, achieve and enjoy the success. But don't make the task or its result more important than your own physical and emotional wellbeing. |