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Soul Sustenance 13-01-2016
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Negative Control And Positive Influence
The power of influence in relationships is extraordinary, but it practically disappears when we try to exercise control and force.
You can influence anyone positively in many ways:
• encouraging,
• sharing,
• listening,
• communicating in the right way.
In negative control we generate stress, frustration and anger. In positive influence the energy flows in a relaxed way with harmony and is not threatening, respecting each one for their specialty and allowing each one to be as they are.
In order to influence positively we need the power of discrimination and judgement in relation to what to say and what to do e.g. when you believe that the other person is the problem; generally the problem is not what others say or do, but rather how you perceive them. The way that you judge is what creates your negative feelings about them. We have the choice to perceive others as a threat, as a problem, or as an opportunity; an opportunity for learning, for change, for dialogue and understanding. We can choose to have compassion (kindness); to feel that the other is a problem indicates a lack of compassion.
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Message for the day 13-01-2016
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To understand is to be understood.
Thought to Ponder: When there is a difference of opinion, we try hard to convince the other person of our point of view. However, since they are doing the same, there is no meeting point. Our effort needs to be in trying to understand the other person first. Even if we cannot understand the logic, we need to understand the emotions behind the argument.
Point to Practice: Today I will go upto one person whom I had an argument with and tell him I understand. For this, I will first change my own thinking and see how well I can understand the other person. I will then find that, because I respect people's opinion and feeling, they too are able to understand us.
In Spiritual Service,
Brahma Kumaris
Soul Sustenance 13-01-2016
--------------------------------------
Negative Control And Positive Influence
The power of influence in relationships is extraordinary, but it practically disappears when we try to exercise control and force.
You can influence anyone positively in many ways:
• encouraging,
• sharing,
• listening,
• communicating in the right way.
In negative control we generate stress, frustration and anger. In positive influence the energy flows in a relaxed way with harmony and is not threatening, respecting each one for their specialty and allowing each one to be as they are.
In order to influence positively we need the power of discrimination and judgement in relation to what to say and what to do e.g. when you believe that the other person is the problem; generally the problem is not what others say or do, but rather how you perceive them. The way that you judge is what creates your negative feelings about them. We have the choice to perceive others as a threat, as a problem, or as an opportunity; an opportunity for learning, for change, for dialogue and understanding. We can choose to have compassion (kindness); to feel that the other is a problem indicates a lack of compassion.
-----------------------------------------
Message for the day 13-01-2016
-----------------------------------------
To understand is to be understood.
Thought to Ponder: When there is a difference of opinion, we try hard to convince the other person of our point of view. However, since they are doing the same, there is no meeting point. Our effort needs to be in trying to understand the other person first. Even if we cannot understand the logic, we need to understand the emotions behind the argument.
Point to Practice: Today I will go upto one person whom I had an argument with and tell him I understand. For this, I will first change my own thinking and see how well I can understand the other person. I will then find that, because I respect people's opinion and feeling, they too are able to understand us.
In Spiritual Service,
Brahma Kumaris
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