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Soul Sustenance 02-11-2012
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Resolving Conflicts In Relationships (Part 1)
In relationships, sometimes we feel that the other person is not only a problem but
also a source of conflicts. We have to be aware that there always have to
be two people involved for there to be an unhappy or conflictive exchange. When
we are in any conflict, it is difficult to see and understand the true causes and
the real energy of the process of the conflict. The emotions that arise inside us
during a conflict distract us and even blind us.
In the first place, it is important to recognize that your response in any situation
of conflict is your contribution to the conflict. The process of responding
to any person or situation is something that takes place in you. Nothing can make
you feel anything without your permission. If you have been in conflict with someone
for a time, for sure, you create fear or anger towards them, expressing
thus behaviors of resistance when you communicate or relate to them. The other person
is not responsible for your emotions or for your behavior.
Your experience of conflict and your contribution to the conflict begin in your
consciousness and you keep them in your consciousness. It begins with your perception
of the other (how you see others). If you perceive them negatively you will
think negatively; you will feel negative and create a negative attitude;
you will behave negatively, and so you will transmit a negative energy.
You don't have to do it like that. Perception is a choice.
When there is conflict there is mental and emotional pain, even physical. Who creates
that pain? You! Who creates at least half of the conflict? You! Where do you dissolve
it? In your consciousness - in you. Freeing yourself of the conflict is a matter
of a decision. At any moment you can decide not to be in conflict. One party has
to dissolve their contribution to the conflict, even if it is temporarily, for the
process of resolution to be able to begin.
(To be continued tomorrow…)
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Message for the day 02-11-2012
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Patience enables one to easily overcome obstacles.
Expression: Usually, when faced with obstacles there is an urgency to remove
it without any proper planning. That means we want to overcome the obstacle without
putting in any effort. And when it is not possible, it tends to create impatience
and frustration in us.
Experience: It is important to do some internal work to overcome an obstacle.
First, it is good to check to what extent there is faith in the self. With faith
in ourselves, we need to plan out before we act to remove or overcome the obstacle
and we will, then, find ourselves successful.
In Spiritual Service,
Brahma Kumaris